It official. We've been living with the Roller's for exacatly one year. It really doesn't feel like a year, that's for sure. It's gone by a lot faster than I've anticipated which is a blessing. A BIG blessing!
It's interesting to look back to this time last year. If I knew then what I know now....we wouldn't have moved in. And that sounds bad, yes, but there are a lot of factors to me saying that, that I don't need to get into. BUT we are very thankful that Scotty's parents have been so kind to let us live with them (without rent). That's kind of a big deal. Which leads me to the 1st thing I've learned while living here:
Never look a gift hourse in the mouth. There are times that I just want to complain about everything. I get so frustrated, but I have to stop and think...I could just as well be living on the streets. Scotty's parents so graciously invited us in. So I have to deal. I've gotten lots better, but I still have days.
I've also learned that I'm WAY more sensitive of a person than I thought I was. I knew I was sensitive...but honestly, it's ridiculous. I worried myself physically sick when we 1st moved in because of something someone had said to me (it was mean). I need to develop thicker skin and quit taking everything so seriously. I've done better at that too. Work in progress, really.
Another lesson I've learned, which has been the hardest, is there are just some people in this world that AREN'T going to like you...and you simply aren't going to like back. And it makes it worse when they're in your family. Oh boy, does it make it worse! At least with others, you can avoid them, but when they're in your family you can't. At one point we were even told we HAVE to get along with these people. And we tried...but some relationships are very poisonous, and we deemed that one of them. I had an anxiety attack one evening just from trying to muster up the courage to be in the same room with them! (Which goes back to the sensitive thing).
And on a lighter note, we've also learned that mice come in packs (read Feburary's post to get that story) and food is a special commodity. That's a story for another time, though.
I have had several moments when I think "I'm not going to make it another 2 years" "I can't handle this environment, I have to get out for my own health and well-being." But really, I can handle it, because God wouldn't have given us this opportunity if I couldn't. On those days I'm ready to move out, I just tell myself, I'm building character and growing as a person. God is clearly teaching me so much about myself and what I can handle. And this goes for Scotty too. I've learned a lot more, but I won't bore you with it all. I'm just anticipating what He has in store for me these next 2 years. I have a feeling there will still be lots of tears, and frustration but I know that it will all work out in the end.
